“Lost in your eyes
Drowning in blue
Out of control, what can I do?
I'm addicted to you” – Addicted to you, Avicii
[f/n]’s day had been just great so far.
First, she had been forced to tolerate the constant presence of numerous men that were suffering from a severe lack of bathing. And, boy, her nose wasn’t sensible, but they were doing everything in their power to make she wish that she could just bite it off and end her suffering, just as great as it was. Someone should present those guys the bigger meaning of the word soap. Or maybe they should just roll on the ground like she had seen some birds doing? At least it would kill the fleas (and no one could dissuade her that some of them didn’t have those).
Second, she had to face the hottest day from all times wearing more layers of clothing than some would use in a winter’s night. Having that absurdly tight piece of cloth wrapped around her chest to hide her gender was extremely necessary, but it was becoming too demanding these last few days, considering the heat and…
Which lead her to the last factor on her small mental list of ‘why her luck had been particularly cruel to her lately’. Ironical too, maybe. God had already proved his point that she wasn’t one of his favorite daughters. She understood the concept, alright. But couldn’t she at least be a little less star-crossed?
She had been feeling an inherent attraction towards the General of her platoon. And if she recalled correctly about what she it had happened between them recently (something that could be wrong, after all the sun could have fried her brain in one point or another, it wasn’t so unlikely), she was corresponded to some degree. That was a problem for two different reasons. From what she had heard, he already had a girl back in his hometown. And also, even if he did bear any feelings for her, that would mean he was gay. And she was merely disguised as a man.
So even if he left his girlfriend (Fiancée? Wife? Sweetheart? She didn’t know exactly what his relationship was.) for [f/n], coming out of the closet for her wouldn’t help. At all. Because she was actually a girl. God, why wasn’t she born a man to end all this confusion?
Those were the main reasons why her day had been just wonderful so far.
And, of course, that series of unfortunate events she had been through wouldn’t be completed if she didn’t add a cherry to the top of the cake.
That said cherry was the fact that she found the only bear trap that the whole army had noticed in the entire forest, tripped over it and got herself suspended more than thirty feet off the ground in the biggest oak she had ever seen in her life. All she wanted to do was to patrol for a little while. Was it that hard?
Oh, yes, it was.
Now there she was, hanging from a tree, with ropes surrounding her body, an extra layer of clothing and a humid, scorching hot night to make her company. And the mosquitos. She could never forget about them. [f/n] left to wonder what would be her chances of getting caught if she opened her shirt just a little. She was feeling suffocated with that uniform. Oh, c’mon, she was dangling on a tree, inside a bear trap for who knows how long. There should be some vantage of being perched up there like a bird, right? At least she could see others coming from that height, couldn’t she?
She never learned.
When the girl finally gathered enough courage to sneak her fingers up her shirt (a hard process, considering how rough was the toils imprisoning her, but she managed somehow) and even undo some of the buttons, she heard a very familiar voice.
Of all people that could find her…
Just why? She whined on her mind, stiffing her whole body like she had received an electrical shock directly on her spine.
“What have you done this time, [l/n]?” He asked in his most neutral tone of voice, something that made her cringe about how much he would yell at her once she was back to the ground.
“Let’s get you down.” He said and she nodded eagerly. At least he wasn’t yelling. Yet. At the moment she agreed she found out that she wished to hit herself on the head as hard as she could.
He’ll see your cleavage, you damn fool!
Who was the idiot that decided that it would be a nice idea to get rid of her uniform? Alright, it was just a couple of buttons and the bandages still were firmly wrapped around her, but still. There was a chance that he would suspect of her true gender on her way down. And what if that happened, what she would do then? Discharged with dishonor. Her brother forced to take her place and enter the army. Being the biggest deception of her entire family. All of that and much more.
And not being allowed to see the General anymore. A shy voice added in her thoughts and she winced. You shouldn’t even be thinking about that! Last time you did, you ended up in a bear trap, ready to have your biggest secret exposed. Way to go, [f/n]!
Dear Lord, she needed to take some time to redefine her priorities.
Because, right at that moment, she should be thinking about how the forest ground was approaching her frighteningly fast and not how Beilschmidt eyes reflected the moonlight, and, God, they were so blue, weren’t they?
Due to her lack of attention on what she should be wary about, her feet were unprepared to support her weight after the sudden fall. Her landing wasn’t particularly suave too, and her left ankle was screaming vividly about it. She contained a yelp to leave her throat, but a small squeak still broke through the barrier of her teeth.
Dumb, idiot, moron, retarded, STUPID!!! Tonight was the night of self-appreciation, apparently. She buttoned her shirt as fast as she was able to do it.
The German kneeled beside her, cutting the ropes that still were tangled around her with a pocket knife. Every time his fingers made contact with her skin she shivered visibly and she couldn’t even justify it with the temperature of the environment. How embarrassing.
“What happened this time, [l/n]?” He asked in a surprisingly gentle way. Due to that, her only reaction was keeping her gaze on everything but himself. She could almost tell which of the leaves belonged to which tree, what a progress. She should become a girl-scout with that amount of knowledge.
The General sighed, apparently tired of trying to extract an answer from her (she would never admit that she did have some troubles of concentration, after all). He stood and offered his hand to her.
“On your feet, soldier.” She took his offer, sincerely hoping that her cheeks decided it was good enough to announce to the whole forest that she was blushing and not the entire continent, like it was seemingly planning. His palms felt calloused, warm and safe against hers and…
She was daydreaming again, wasn’t she?
As soon as she placed her weight on both of her feet a grimace crossed her features, her ankle shouting to be noticed once more. The man seemed to notice that too.
“You're hurt.” He stated, making it clear that it was an affirmative and not a question. So she merely confirmed it. Beilschmidt shrugged. “Nothing else to do, then.”
Wait, what exactly did he mean with that?
General Beilschmidt turned his back to her and lowered himself. The girl blinked a couple of times in confusion, not actually allowing herself to believe in what those actions suggested. He gave her an exasperate look over his shoulder.
“Come, [l/n]. That’s an order.”
The girl noticed that she was trembling when she wrapped her arms around his neck to make herself steady in the position, while he held her legs by the knees (and she hoped he wouldn’t notice how weak they were) to offer her a proper support. Heat spread from the places he touched, irradiating warmth to her entire body. Her breathing shortened, even if she wasn’t the one who was carrying two people at the current moment.
It took a while so the situation hit her fully.
The General was giving her a piggyback ride.
[f/n] wished she could sing, bury herself, climb up that tree with the bear trap around her, giggle like a little girl, explode at that very second, become invisible, run away from that scene, and never let him go again. All at once and yet none of them. Quite confusing, to say the least.
And was it just a trick of the dim illumination, or his ears were outrageously scarlet too?
He is gay and you’re doomed.
It wouldn’t be very manly of her to sink her chin against his neck, would it? Because she felt like planting kisses against the reddening skin that she could see between the collar of his uniform and the hairline in the back of his head. That also wasn’t a very professional (or masculine) posture of her.
Keep yourself together, dammit. Her mind grumbled and she did her best to attend it.
“Tomorrow we’ll have a swimming challenge.” The German said a little rigidly. Was it her or he was nearly trotting his way back to the camp?
“I love swimming.” She blurted out before her eyes widened. If she started punching herself on the mouth it would be far too obvious, wouldn’t it?
You are THE DUMBEST creature that has ever set foot on Earth.
Now she couldn’t say that she didn’t know how to swim. And, as far as she knew, that said activity usually was performed without a shirt. Only that she couldn’t comply that, could she? She shivered at the thought of what tomorrow could bring.
What she had done?